Happy Friday Reader

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“I just wish they’d be more direct.”

I’ve heard leaders say this countless times. Usually after a frustrating conversation where they felt like they couldn’t pin down what someone actually meant. I get it. I’ve felt that frustration too.

But I’ve started to notice something. When we ask for directness, what we’re actually asking for is clarity. And those two things aren’t the same.

You can be incredibly direct and still leave someone completely confused.

Think about the last time you told someone to “be more strategic” or “think about the bigger picture” or “keep me in the loop.” Feels direct. You’ve named the person. You’ve addressed them face to face. You’ve told them what you need. Job done.

Except it isn’t. Because what does “more strategic” actually look like on Monday morning? Fewer details in meetings? More long-term planning? Different priorities? And “keep me in the loop” — does that mean email you daily? Copy you on everything? Only flag problems? The person walks away nodding, but they’re guessing. And when they guess wrong, you’re frustrated all over again, wondering why they didn’t listen.

They did listen. They just didn’t understand. Because directness without clarity is just noise.

I’ve watched leaders deliver feedback that felt clear in the moment, only to find nothing changed afterwards. Not because the other person was difficult. Because phrases like “tighten this up” or “make sure it lands well” or “use your professional judgement” don’t actually tell anyone what to do differently. They sound like you’ve said something. You haven’t.

Now flip it.

Imagine you’re in a staff meeting and you say: “Just a reminder that budget requests need to be submitted by the 15th. I’ll be reviewing them that afternoon, so anything that comes in late won’t make it into the planning cycle.”

You haven’t named anyone. You haven’t pointed fingers. You haven’t called out the person who was late last year. Indirect. But everyone in that room knows exactly what’s expected, exactly when, and exactly what happens if they miss it. No ambiguity. No guessing.

Or this: a teacher keeps arriving five minutes after students. Instead of pulling them aside, you address the whole staff. “I want to reset expectations around morning routines. Everyone in the building by 8am, ready to receive students.” You haven’t accused anyone. But the expectation is unmistakable. The person who needs to hear it has heard it. So has everyone else.

That’s indirect clarity. And it’s a tool that gets overlooked because we’ve been told that good leadership means being direct.

Being direct is fine. Often it’s exactly the right approach. But it’s not the only route to clarity, and it doesn’t guarantee clarity either.

The real question isn’t “am I being direct enough?” It’s “does this person actually know what I’m asking them to do?”

I talked through this properly in this week’s episode, including a quadrant framework that might shift how you think about your communication.

What’s a phrase you catch yourself using that sounds direct but might actually be leaving people confused? Hit reply and let me know.

Have a great weekend.

Shane

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